I wrote this in response to 4.15.13, Boston. It was in anguish that my feet carried me outside on a nice day. And it was anguish that enticed me to pick up my pencil and write. I am not eloquent, save in some small academic measure of speaking. I do not write…whatever close approximation to poetry this is. In fact, I’m pretty terrible at all forms of poetry. But here it is, for your reading (dis?)pleasure, transcribed from my notebook, in the manner in which it came to me, hence the choppiness to the writing. As always, thank you for reading.
In Search of Peace
I sit with the dead,
trying to find the peace
which seems so elusive.
Alone, save for the peaceful,
silent histories, and
nature’s own trumpeting
heralds of life.
Though sun light is
high, warmly filtering to
the cool ground
the boughs of these
trees, these stalwart
sentinels of the dead,
creak and groan with
the lamentation of lives that
have been lived.
An eerie reminder of our
own state of existence, those
fleeting moments of consciousness
which allow ourselves ultimate
expression in transience.
Often, I wonder here,
what amounts to the extent
of ourselves and deeds,
for when tragedy strikes,
shall not we find the true context
with those around us?
The wind catches the dried
stalks of last year’s grass,
withered,
which whispers softly in the
breeze.
Wind, or memory?
The peace of a quiet bone
yard or, perhaps,
the ever-present peace of
the completion of life.
It is peaceful here,
with these dead.
So much so that I feel
Almost an imposition.
Not an accepted or welcome
feature of the turning of time.
Peace, ever-fleeting, feels to
be their domain, while we
flesh and motion, know
naught but turmoil and
the chaotic, sporadic nature
of humanity.
A duo of crows,
iridescent feathered messengers,
take flight, the mocking
calls of their throaty
cackle denying me
that acceptance of
the peace, so elusive and
hard won.
A distant church bell echoes,
a sibilant chorus to the
hungry taps of an ever-eager
woodpecker, feasting
his fill.
Expediency, it seems is
needed in my contemplation.
These dead, peaceful, people
want me to tarry not
at all. While
of gentle demeanor, I am
an ultimate interruption.
And so I take my leave
of peace, and enter the
chaos of transition and change
once more.